Living Life to the Fullest

I don't truly even know what this means. What do I mean by this? Exactly what it says. I've never really lived. What does it mean to truly live? I hear people talk about this all the time. They do what they want and don't have to think twice about modifying because their butt doesn't fit in the seat or buying two airline tickets just so there is enough room. They can buy cute clothes. They have boyfriends/girlfriends/husbands/wives/children. I've never experienced that. 

I will relay the funny story about my last airline experience (and unless something drastic happens, will be my last airline experience until I can comfortably ride in one seat). 

Sara and I decided to go visit some friends and their son who reside in Kentucky. The nearest airport was Nashville. So, Sara and I bought our tickets and all was well. I bought 2 tickets for comfort reasons. When I picked up my tickets, one had my name correctly and the other had the name listed as "Extra Seat." So we walk down the terminal to check in and the flight attendant asks for identification. I give her mine. She asks for Extra Seat's identification. I'm pretty sure I just looked at her stupidly. I told her that there was no other person...that Sara and I were the only travelers. On and on this went until the line for people to check in was astronomically long. Finally in an exasperated tone I just looked at her and said, "I am fat and bought two seats!" She seemed to get it that time, let Sara, myself and "Extra Seat" board, and the rest of the trip was uneventful. 

I do not ever want to have to go through that again. You may wonder that after that experience, why didn't I focus on losing weight then? Well...I don't know. Control issues like I previously described? Fear of failure? Overwhelmed at the vast amount of pounds to lose? Of course, had I done it then, it wouldve been less to lose, but that is neither here nor there. Whatever the reason, I didn't do it. I wish I would've. I wonder if by now I would be what I want to be. If I would be married and starting a family. What I do know is that everything works together for a purpose. Maybe my purpose is to encourage someone else along this road. Maybe not. But whatever the circumstance, I am going to choose to be thankful for I am and who I am becoming. This is the journey of a lifetime.