Two months since I've blogged. Wow. That's insane. I haven't blogged because I don't want to blog. I don't want to report in and say that I have had no success in the past 3 months. That I haven't lost a pound in 3 months. Before you all say, "it's just a plateau..." stop. It isn't. It may have started that way. But that's not why I haven't lost weight. I haven't lost weight because I haven't really tried. I've lost the ambition and drive to finish this journey. That stresses me out. When I am stressed, I eat. It makes me upset. When I'm upset, I eat. And, I don't eat what I'm supposed to. I eat what I want, when I want. I haven't reverted to my old habits, completely. They are not what they were when I first started this journey, that is for certain. I don't know why I can't seem to get this under control.
I'm done being soft. I'm resolving that I am going to give this last little bit of weight that I need to lose before the surgery a 100% effort. That means going back to the basics. I'll be eating lots of chicken, brown rice and greens for the next six weeks. I have my pre-operative appointment set for October 1 and I would like to have lost another 30 pounds. That's a tall order, but one that can be reached if I just suck it up and do it. I have done it before, I can do it again.
To all my friends and family who have encouraged me to not give up along the way, thank you. Those words of encouragement mean the world to me. To Danny, thanks for the tough love. It's hard to tell people what they don't want to hear, but thanks for doing it anyway.
I am doing this.
