Friday, January 17, 2014

Plateaus

Plateaus stink. No one should have to ever go through them. I understand the science behind the plateau (sorta) - that your body says, "I'm comfortable here," but three weeks, really? I have followed my eating plan to a "T" and had not one ounce of weight loss since my last weight loss the first week I came off the December "eat whatever I want" fest (even with my hopeful "shock" to my system - a/k/a breakfast yesterday). My formerly 459 pound body has become comfortable at an overweight 315 pounds. And the scale isn't budging.

So now what do I do? Do I give up or give in because the going got tough? I have been tempted. I'll be honest. It is frustrating to see the scale not budge. BUT...despite that, I can tell a difference even still. The weight may not be changing, but I am confident the inches are. For the first time in my life, I went to a legitimate store (to clarify, it is the "heavy" girl store, NOT the "fat" girl store) and bought new workout clothes. And they fit. And I'm so excited about that. It was so refreshing to feel like I was in workout clothes and not just a grungy t-shirt and sweats. I can't wait to buy more (in a smaller size, of course)! And, my t-shirt that I was self-conscious about last week - not so much this week.

So, for me, it's back to square one. I'm eating my diet plan (still) but I'm cutting out the extras. No fancy schmancy food for me. It's back to five meals a day, three hours apart, and following a carb cycling routine. And....cardio. Lots and lots (and did I mention LOTS) of cardio? Hopefully this will jolt my system or my system will catch up or whatever it needs to do and drop those pounds.

Ultimately, though, I'm still working through these details, but...I am me. I am redefining myself. I am worth this journey. I cannot do it on my own, but I am worth it.

Bottom line.

It's been awhile....a good long while

It has been a good long while since I have felt anything but self-hate and negativity toward myself. I tried not to show it on the outside, ...